2016 Election

Here's my hope for today.

I hope that people can be kind to one another. Tonight, someone will win and someone will lose. Someone will be the new president, that's the only guarantee. I think that a lot of people would agree that these two people are not who we would ideally choose to lead our nation. Both candidates have said or done deplorable things. I have seen so much hate this election season and I want better for my daughter, for our children.

My biggest hope for tonight is that I will see gracious winners and losers. Because here's the thing, if we want a better, kinder world for our kids, it starts with us. It starts with your behavior at home. Our children should first look to us to be examples. It is our job as parents to help fight the good fight against hate in this country. It is up to us to teach them right from wrong no matter who is sitting in the Oval Office.

Whatever the outcome tonight, remember that there are impressionable little people watching. Their eyes are on us, always. What will they learn from you?

He's Still Not Here

It finally happened. 299 days. I needed to call Dad and couldn't.

I've been away from the blog for a while. To be honest, we've been busy and who wants to read about grief all the time anyway?

I love to share memories of Dad. I think about him every day. I miss him more than anyone could know. I want to text him pictures of Wesleigh. I want him to spend holidays with us. It's so incredibly hard to just keep living life without him here to share it.

Today, after 13 years of driving, I ran out of gas somewhere. I had switched cars for my Dad's truck to haul some pavers home from Lowes and just out of hurry didn't realize I was driving on fumes. Made it to Lowes and loaded up the car only to get back in and have the truck not start.

That's when I needed to call Dad. He's the one I would've called, had he been here. Even after getting married, he's the first I would've called to rescue me.

I would love to talk to him daily. I yearn to hear his voice or see his name on my phone screen, sending me a picture of Newman, asking for a picture of Wesleigh. But today, I REALLY needed him. It was the first time he couldn't just come when I couldn't help myself and nobody else was around.

Thankfully, there was a gas station right next to Lowes. I went inside, bought a gas can and walked over to fill it. A nice cashier showed me how to use it (kinda complicated actually) and I was able to put gas in the truck. It started. Away I went.

It's weird the moments that can smack you in the face with grief. 299 days. It's not any easier than day 1.